Two days ago I ordered flowers for Nicole on FTD.com. I figured they should be pretty reliable — when I think of flowers I think of FTD; and I buy stuff online all the time.
Nothing was further from the truth.
All day yesterday — Valentine’s Day — I waited for word from her that flowers had arrived at her office. She works in Harlem and, while there are flower shops throughout the city, I had a feeling that deliverers would wait until the end of the day to make it up by her.
But by late afternoon I heard nothing. So I asked her about it, spilling the beans in the process. Immediately after, I called FTD to see what the hell was going on, since I had now gotten Nicole nothing for Valentine’s Day. I was greeting with a recording that told me something to the effect of, “Due to high holiday call volume, no one can take your call. Please go to the web site.”
So I went to the site and filled out a form with my confirmation number and name. I was told I’d get an email as soon as they had word from the florist who was delivering my flowers. But the rest of the day ticked by and I heard nothing. By last night it was obvious that I had nothing to show for Valentine’s Day.
Meanwhile, Nicole got me socks and chocolate.
Today (2/15), she still hadn’t received anything and I hadn’t heard back. I called again and got the same asinine recording, so I again filled out the web form. This time, a couple of hours later, I heard back:
No wonder you can’t deliver my product on 2/14 — not unless you know Doc Brown and have access to his Delorean!
I love that they’re asking me to visit www.ftd.com/love to get $10 off future purchases.
If you go to the FTD site you’ll see a banner telling you that you have a “Second Chance for Romance!” Not with FTD I don’t.